The Lord Cage’s Prayer:
Our Father, which art in Snake Eyes,
Nicolas be thy name;
thy Face/Off come;
thy Con-Air be done,
on earth as it is in Deadfall.
Give us this day our daily Ghost Rider.
And forgive him for Trespass,
as we forgave him for Windtalkers.
And lead us not into Adaptation;
but deliver us from The Rock.
For thine is the Wicker Man,
the National Treasure,
for ever and ever.
Hello Supercult West! This is Supercult South Bad Movie Professor Cameron Coker (BS in “Like, the Galleria” with a minor in “Mandatory Boobage”) and I’m reaching out to you from across the country to help hype tonight’s screening of Valley Girl, a testimony to how much we love Nicholas Cage and how much we will endure to bask in his glory.
Valley Girl is the first film Nicolas Cage, born Nicolas Coppola, nephew of Francis Ford Coppola, was billed as Nicholas Cage, and usually that enough would qualify it as a Supercult classic, but we’re just getting started, folks.
Once upon a time in 1983 some producers thought to cash in on the stupid California teenager culture by making a film based on Frank Zappa’s hit single Valley Girl. When Zappa refused, the producers said, screw it, let’s make it anyway! Let’s write a script in 10 days, base the story loosely on Romeo and Juliet (teenagers will love that crap), only give the director a measly budget of $350 thousand forcing them to rely on school friends for crew and the personal wardrobe of the crew for costumes! Also, because we gotta appeal to them horny teens, we’re gunna make it rated R and require the director to show female breasts at least four times.
So, yeah, this movie is a trashy, 80s, teen-sploitation film made on the cheap. It’s also a surprisingly poignant story about trying to do the right thing while still having a good time and has an 83% on Rotten Tomatoes. So…yeah, like, go figure!
The Supercult Show is proud to present Valley Girl!
All hail our lord and savior Nicolas Cage!