Hello Supercult West! This is Supercult South Bad Movie Professor Cameron Coker (BS in “Baby Oil” with a minor in “Big Foreheads”) and we continue tonight’s Butt-numb-a-thon with a little bit of hype for Fast and Furious 6, aka, the one with the tank in it.
Did you know that back in Fast 5 the roll of DSS agent Luke Hobbs was originally intended for a 65-year-old Tommy Lee Jones! That is until a fan named Jan Kelly suggested to Vin Diesel that she would love to see The Rock and Diesel work together on screen. After the success of Fast 5, Dwayne Johnson became an essential part of any Fast and Furious installment. Take note Supercultists. This is the point in the franchise where the Fast and Furious films begin their slow but steady shift into the bald, sweaty, muscly, bromance genre, a move I’m sure we all agree is a welcome one.
It starts real slow and gentle with a little bit of, “Yeah my crew will team up with law enforcement just this once in return for amnesty.” Then it spices things up in Furious 7 with some of that, “Yeah, I’m down for a beefy man threesome with Nathan Statham.” Then goes long and hard with a big ol’ heap of “I need you grab Statham, rally my crew, save my baby, and then save me from myself!” MMMhh, yeah girl, that’s how you break a billion worldwide!
So turn down the lights and put on some sexy jazz Supercultists. Go ahead and grab some baby oil, and snuggle up to a big, bald, sweaty, hunk of your own, ‘cuz even in the world of that Fast and the Furious, there’s always room for the Slow and the Sensual.
Supercult West is proud to present the Fast and the Furious 6!